Talk:Newbie Dash/@comment-27180913-20160331214608/@comment-7345250-20160331235620

Because you're ludicrously misrepresenting the interests of these characers. Remember that "I'd like to be a tree" line from Over a Barrel? Things like that are not meant to be taken seriously to such an extent that the character's innermost desires start to look freaky and brainless.