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Episode It Isn't the Mane Thing About You
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[ponies chattering]
[flowers rustling]
Filthy Rich: Hmph! Looks like I'm not the only one who left Mares Day to the last minute.
Sweetie Drops: There's just so many! How can I choose?!
[angry crowd chattering]
Rose: Now, hang on, everypony! We'll help all of you!
Sweetie Drops: How?!
Rarity: What I would do...
[crowd gasps]
Rarity: ...is pick flowers that accentuate my mane. It makes for a captivating color story when you present them to whomever they're intended.
[boop]
[flowers rustling]
Lily Valley: That's it!
Rose: Color consultations was a great idea, Rarity! Now, what can we do for you?
Rarity: Oh, darling, I need a dozen lavender pieces for Photo Finish's shoot on the most beautiful manes in Equestria.
[beat]
Rarity: I know you're swamped, but it's for Vanity Mare! She's going to take pictures of my mane, so color coordination is a must.
Rose: Anything for you, Rarity.
[fans blowing]
Rarity: Have you a single big one? If the wind came from one direction, it would really intensify the effect.
Mr. Breezy: I don't. Uh, but I could make you one! It's not like I've got anything else to do.
[door opens]
[whistle]
Rarity: Hmm. I do enjoy the windswept look, but other ponies might need to see it before they feel it.
[switch clicks]
[door opens]
[ponies aah-ing]
Rarity: My mane will be flowing over the chaise in the tableau I have in mind. But I was hoping to choose the color. Could you make one in a pale yellow? I need something across the color wheel from this. [giggles]
"Chelsea Porcelain": Oh, if these came in different colors, I'd buy one for every room.
Davenport: Hmm... Sales have been down. More colors it is!
[bits clinking]
[bell rings]
Rarity: Pinkie? I need to put Photo Finish in a good mood, and nothing creates a better mood than your confecti— Ooh. Am I interrupting?
Pinkie Pie: We were just celebrating the anniversary of the twins' first sneezes! [giggles] [clears throat]
Just about one year ago
There was a tickle in your nose
You snorted through the nursery
[snorts]
Happy Sneeze-iversary!
Achoo! Achoo! Aaaaa-choo!
[can squirting]
Rarity: [deadpan] Congratulations.
Pound Cake and Pumpkin Cake: [blow on candles]
[theme song]
[stretching]
[snap!]
Rarity: [shrieks] Pinkie! I can't have Photo Finish shoot my mane like this! And this party string won't come off!
Pinkie Pie: Oh, that's because it's not just party string. It's super-sticky celebration string!
Rarity: [low growl]
Pinkie Pie: Sorry. I guess my sneeze-versary was a little too sneeze-abratory. [giggles nervously]
Rarity: [shuddering sigh] It'll be fine, Pinkie. I'll find a way to clean this up before the shoot tomorrow. [whimper] Actually, you might consider doing the same.
[stretching]
Pinkie Pie: [grunting, straining] If only we had some kind of super-sudsy mane conditioning shampoo for you and a magical cleaning remover potion for me.
Rarity: [gasps] That's it! We'll pay a visit to Zecora! She's a wonder with a cauldron. I'm sure she can mix up a fix for both of us.
Pinkie Pie: [straining]
[splat]
Pinkie Pie: That's good, because it would take forever to yank all of those baked goods out of the super-sticky celebration string.
Rarity: I... think you may still have some baking to do.
[eerie music]
Rarity: I do wish Zecora lived in town. One shouldn't have to brave the darkest part of the forest for shampoo.
Pinkie Pie: Do you think Photo Finish would want to take a picture of my mane?
[bird flapping]
Rarity: Well, uh... Hmm...I'm not sure that your style is quite right for this particular photo essay. Photo Finish travelled everywhere in her search for the most beautiful of manes.
Pinkie Pie: [shaking]
[poink!]
Creature: [yelp]
Pinkie Pie: Even Yakyakistan?
Rarity: Well, yaks don't have manes, per se, and I'm not sure their style is quite what she's looking for either.
[splash]
Rarity: Though at this moment, neither is mine.
Pinkie Pie: Don't worry! Zecora will abso-tively be able to help!
Rarity: I'm sure you're right.
[beat]
Rarity: Listen, spooky eyes! Why don't you take a picture?! It will last longer!
[creatures squeaking]
Rarity: On second thought, don't. Getting my picture taken in this state is what I'm trying to avoid!
Rarity: Are you certain that's safe?
Zecora: I'm sure they seem strange, but my methods are mine. After all, I've been doing this for quite a long time.
Pinkie Pie: I'll have those cupcakes cleaned off in no time!
Rarity: You really should bake new ones.
Pinkie Pie: Nah!
Zecora: For your mane, of course, just soap will do, so use my super-sudsy shampoo.
Rarity: Oh-ho, what a relief! I can't tell you how worried I was that my mane wouldn't be ready for the shoot. [laughs]
Zecora: You were right to be concerned. Manes are tricky, I have learned.
Rarity: Oh! [scoffs] Tell me about it!
Zecora: Cleaning is simple, but a magical fix could cause any number of troublesome ticks.
Pinkie Pie: Really?
Zecora: Oh, there are tales I could tell to make your hair stand on end. Horrifying, terrifying attempts to mane-mend!
Rarity: Well, I do enjoy a good yarn, but I'm not sure I could take anymore mane fright today.
Pinkie Pie: Well, I love a good scary story! [giggles]
Zecora: There's the contagious frizz that spreads friend to friend, or the story of the infinitely splitting end!
Rarity: [screams]
[clatter]
Rarity: Uh-huh, hmm, yes, well, very entertaining. Uh, thanks for the shampoo. Ta-ta!
Pinkie Pie: Anything about curls that keep on curling until your whole body is one big curl?
Zecora: [laughs] There is one story I nearly forgot: of an Earth pony who needed to clean up her shop.
Pinkie Pie: Wow! That's just what I have to do! Huh, weird.
Zecora: Perhaps it'd be better if I were more clear. You can't clean up Sugarcube Corner from here.
Pinkie Pie: Geez, Zecora, I can take a hint.
Zecora: With just a few drops, any mess you'll improve if you focus on that which you want to remove.
Pinkie Pie: It won't be hard to focus on the super-sticky celebration string. It's kinda the only thing you can see.
Pinkie Pie: Zecora says it would only take a few drops, but I figured we should all chip in. Just in case! Remember to only focus on the party string. We don't wanna accidentally remove anything else.
Pound Cake and Pumpkin Cake: [babbling]
Pinkie Pie: Ooh! Sudsy! [giggles]
Rarity: [humming] A relaxing shower really gives you the chance to focus on the fabulosity of your mane! [laughs, sniff sniff] Not the most pleasant scent, but it gets the job done. [humming] My mane feels lighter alrea— [screams]
Zecora: [sipping]
[door opens]
Zecora: [spits]
Rarity: It's important that you know that I am not pointing hooves, but—
Zecora: I don't understand. Is that you, Rarity? Why would you think to point your hooves at me?
Rarity: Let's just say I understand why your shampoo hasn't made a splash in the marketplace.
[cloak rustling]
Rarity: Goodness, Zecora! You could at least pretend it isn't that bad!
Zecora: I'm sorry, my dear, but there is nothing to say. You just took the wrong potion from here yesterday.
Rarity: Oh, thank goodness! I thought maybe your shampoo had triggered early-onset mare pattern baldness!
Zecora: No, this lack of hair was put into motion when you mistakenly washed with remover potion.
Rarity: [laughing] Oh, what a relief! Well, if you could just whip up a cure, I'll be on my way. So much to do before the shoot tomorrow.
Zecora: As I mentioned before, there's no easy fix. Mane-mending magic's the trickiest of tricks.
Rarity: [mumbling] Sorry?
Zecora: I doubt that your mane has left us forever. There is a chance we can fix it, I think, if we're clever.
Rarity: W-w-w-w-w-w-wait, there's, there's a chance?! You think?!
Zecora: I need to focus if I'm to work any faster. One wrong ingredient spells utter disaster. You should go finish your list of to-dos. Keep your mind off of all of these mane-losing blues.
[ponies chattering]
Rarity: [exhales] There's nothing to worry about. Zecora will have a cure before I've even finished my to-dos. But I don't know if I can even show my face looking like this!
Caramel: [gasps]
"Mint Flower": [crying]
Rose: I'm sorry, miss, but I can't match your mane if I can't see it.
Golden Harvest: What about mine?
Rose: Marigold, I should think!
Rarity: Uh, sorry. I, uh, believe it was my turn, and I-I-I-I just need to pick up some—
[flowers rustling]
Golden Harvest: Perfect!
Merry May: Now me!
[squeak]
Customer Pony: It's wonderful how this display shows that your fans provide just the right amount of air!
Mr. Breezy: Well, I owe it all to Rarity.
Rarity: Oh, so kind of you to say. I-I—
Mr. Breezy: Kindness has nothing to do with it! Rarity always knows how to make something look its best. Probably because she looks so good herself! That ain't something us non-fabulous folk here can understand.
Rarity: N-Non-fabulous?!
[customers agreeing]
[ponies muttering]
Davenport: Now I appreciate everypony's interest in our new sofa colors, but the yellow one is spoken for.
Rarity: Oh, thank you, Davenport. Um, perhaps I can pick it up once everypony leav—
Berryshine: I'll give you twice whatever the pony who wants to buy the yellow one is paying!
Sprinkle Medley: Three times!
Rarity: But— But— I— I—
Davenport: Sold!
[ripping noise]
[crowd gasps]
Rarity: [worried shriek]
Rarity: I can't believe how differently ponies treat you when you can't command their attention.
Twilight Sparkle: Are you sure that's what happened?
Starlight Glimmer: Wait. You can't command ponies' attention because your mane's messed up?
Rarity: "Messed up"? Does this look "messed up" to you?!
Twilight Sparkle and Starlight Glimmer: [gasps]
Rarity: Honestly! How hard is it to pretend it's not so bad?
Starlight Glimmer: Hard.
Rarity: If today is any indication of how ponies will treat me from now on, I can't simply wait to see if my mane grows back!
Twilight Sparkle: I'm sorry, Rarity. I'm sure nopony means to make you feel worse than you already do.
Starlight Glimmer: Didn't you say Zecora was working on a cure?
Rarity: Yes, well, even if everypony isn't utterly indifferent to my presence, Zecora might not be able to fix this in time for the shoot. Can't you do a spell to restore some semblance of my mane?!
Starlight Glimmer: The thing is, it's pretty much like Zecora said. Fixing manes with magic is—
Rarity: Tricky! I know! I don't care! Make with the tricks!
Starlight Glimmer: Huh?
Twilight Sparkle: [sighs]
[magic zap]
"Silver Medal": [screams]
[shattering]
[magic zap]
[bird pecking]
Rarity: This won't do! I need an actual mane!
Starlight Glimmer: But it has to come from somewhere.
Twilight Sparkle: Oh, you can't just make a mane with magic. The results could be disastrous.
Rarity: More disastrous than this?!
[thump]
[magic zaps]
[flapping noise]
[scissors snipping]
Twilight Sparkle: [sighs] I don't think there's anything else we can try.
Rarity: [panicked stuttering] B-But Zecora said there was still a chance!
[door opens]
Zecora: At last, Rarity, I have searched for so long! What I told you before was totally wrong!
Twilight Sparkle: Zecora, you found a cure? That's amazing!
Rarity: [sighs in relief] You mean I'll get my fabulous mane back in time for the shoot?
Zecora: Oh, no. I'm afraid I can't fix it before the big shoot. But in time, the hair will grow back from the root. There's no magical cure to hasten us through it, unless you went backward in time to undo it.
Starlight Glimmer: Uh-uh. I think we can both say that's not a good option.
Rarity: [groans, bawling]
Rarity: I have always believed that the right outfit can make up for any other areas that are lacking. But I will need your honest opinions. [nervous ta-da] How awful is it?
Applejack, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash: [simultaneously] Uhhh...
Opalescence: [yowls]
Rarity: Oh, come on! Can't anypony pretend it's not bad?!
Fluttershy: We could, um, try.
Rainbow Dash: Maybe...?
Rarity: Well, if any of you have an idea how to make this disaster look good enough for Photo Finish's piece in Vanity Mare on the most beautiful manes in Equestria, [sobbing] I'm open to hearing it!
Applejack: Is that all?
Rainbow Dash: No problem!
Rarity: Hm?
[Bessie being milked]
Rarity: I don't understand, Applejack. How is milking a cow going to help?
Applejack: That's just it. It looks like we hired a new milkmaid...
Granny Smith: This is pretty close to my color as a young'un!
Applejack: Just a little down-home ingenuity.
Rarity: It's a good idea, Applejack, but Photo Finish is looking for the most beautiful manes, not bonnets.
[thip]
Applejack: [laughs nervously]
Rainbow Dash: This'll do the trick. Just you wait!
[spinning noises]
Rarity: [gasps] You know, this is really quite fetching!
Rainbow Dash: Yes! Nailed it!
[poof]
Rarity: ...Just not portable.
Rainbow Dash: [groans]
Harry: [growling]
[squirrel chittering]
Fluttershy: There!
Rarity: Oh, let's face it. I'll just have to call Photo Finish and cancel.
Twilight Sparkle: I think we all know how bad Rarity's been feeling, but I never thought she'd cancel her shoot with Photo Finish.
Rainbow Dash: You saw her mane, right?
Applejack: But it's Rarity. If anypony can turn lemons into lemonade, it's her.
Fluttershy: I guess it's harder for her when she feels like the lemon.
Twilight Sparkle: Well, she's not a lemon – she's our friend. And right now, she needs our support.
[knocking]
Rarity: [muffled] Come in.
[bell rings]
Rarity: Would you mind closing the door? I'm more comfortable in the dark.
[click]
Applejack: Okay, Rarity, you've done just about enough sulkin'! Havin' a fabulous mane is a wonderful thing, but it ain't the only thing!
Rainbow Dash: Yeah! And we're here to remind you how awesome you are, mane or no mane!
Rarity: [sighs] It's lovely of you to say, but it's hard to argue with cold, hard facts.
Fluttershy: What facts are those?
Rarity: That without my mane, I simply can't shine as I once did, and ponies treat me like the sad, invisible pony I've become.
Twilight Sparkle: Rarity, you're not invisible. You're our friend. A friend that started a fashion empire.
Fluttershy: A friend who made us all feel beautiful in her lovely creations.
Rainbow Dash: A friend who stuck by us, no matter what!
Applejack: A friend so generous that she once chopped off her own tail to help a sea serpent.
Twilight Sparkle: I know you lost some confidence when you lost your mane, but unlike your hair, confidence is something you can get back right now.
Rarity: Goodness... You're right! The only pony behaving differently today was me! Besides, what doesn't shine from the outside in...
Starlight Glimmer: Um, Rarity, what are you doing?
Rarity: I'm preparing to shine from the inside out!
[guitar twang]
Rest of main cast and Starlight Glimmer: [gasps]
Rainbow Dash: Awesome!
[flowers rustling]
Filthy Rich: It's my own fault. I shouldn't have bought flowers without asking Spoiled what she likes.
Rose: Well, we don't have much left. What does she like?
Filthy Rich: Um, uh... purple?
Rarity: I have a solution!
[guitar twang]
Rose: Rarity, that mane is...
Daisy and Lily Valley: Amazing!
Rarity: Thank you. Although I'm afraid I missed my chance at Vanity Mare, which means I have quite a few lavender arrangements to spare.
Filthy Rich: Uh, is lavender purple?
[flowers rustling]
[fans blowing]
Rarity: Mm... The windswept look is very last-season. Perhaps you could set this up outside. It's sure to draw in the hoof traffic.
[fan blowing]
Stallion: Ahhh!
[crowd chattering]
[bits clinking]
Rarity: Photoshoot or no, you can always use a chaise!
Applejack: Well, Rarity, if you wanted to shine from the inside out, I think this afternoon, you became the brightest filly in Equestria!
Rarity: Oh, pshaw, Applejack. I'm simply making up for all the time I wasted feeling sorry for myself.
Rainbow Dash: I don't know why you were so upset. Your mane looks awesome!
Rarity: I'm just glad I have all of you to remind me that even if I accidentally use magical remover potion on my mane, I can look good on the outside as long as I feel good on the inside.
Twilight Sparkle: How'd you end up using remover potion on your head, anyway?
Rarity: [gasps] Pinkie!
Rarity: If I had the remover potion this whole time, that means Pinkie must have the—
[door opens]
[flooding noise]
Pinkie Pie: Wheeeeeeee! [giggling]
Rarity: ...shampoo.
Pinkie Pie: Shampoo? Wow! That explains why our manes are all so bouncy and soft!
[guitar twang]
Rarity: Uh, perhaps I'll fetch the rest of that remover potion.
Pinkie Pie: Great! Hey, is there something different about you? New hoof polish?
Rarity: So you're sure? You're sure it's fully recovered?
Applejack: Yes, Rarity. It's been months. Your mane looks fine.
Pinkie Pie: Oooh, look! It's the "Most Beautiful Manes in Equestria" issue of Vanity Mare! You should read it.
Rarity: Oh, honestly, Pinkie? After all I went through, I'm not sure it even matters what mane graces the page—
[whap]
Pinkie Pie: Read it!
Rarity: But I... I cancelled the shoot.
Applejack: We had a little talk with Photo Finish.
Fluttershy: And explained just how beautiful we thought you were. Inside and out.
[pages flicking]
Rainbow Dash: While you were shining from the inside out, Photo Finish took a few pictures.
Rarity: I don't know what to say!
Applejack: Luckily, you don't have to say anything. Your style speaks for itself.
Mane cast: [encouraging noises]
[credits]
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