Transcripts/The Jinxie Games

The Jinxie Games

Transcript
Episode	The Jinxie Games
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Pipp Petals: [groaning] Argh!

Sunny Starscout: Okay! A protein power punch for Zipp, fruity-colada for Pipp, and for her "Royal Fly-ness", the usual – a green monster with extra greens, hold the monster. Hey, where is your mom anyway?

[phone chiming]

Pipp Petals: Oh, she sent a text! She says... Huh. Dog emoji.

Sunny Starscout: What does that mean?

Zipp Storm: Mom's terrible at texting. Last week, she sent me a text that just said, "Don't".

Pipp Petals: But she never misses mother-daughter brunch! And now she's sending us cryptic messages? It can only mean one thing... She's been pony-napped!

Sunny Starscout and Zipp Storm: [laugh]

Pipp Petals: [chuckles nervously] You're right. That sounded less silly in my head.

Hitch Trailblazer: Pony-napped?!

Pipp Petals: Huh?

Hitch Trailblazer: Never fear! Hitch is here!

Sparky Sparkeroni: [grunting]

Zipp Storm: Slow your roll! Or, uh... slow your hop, buddy. It's no big deal. Mom just didn't show up for our monthly brunch.

Pipp Petals: But she did send us this dog emoji!

Hitch Trailblazer: Sorry! Can't... see... while... bouncing!

Zipp Storm: Yeah, I'm gonna need some context for what all of this is, Hitch.

Hitch Trailblazer: [panting] I'm training for Forest Critter Field Day!

Sunny Starscout: What's that?

Izzy Moonbow: [blows whistle] That's a hop-stoppage penalty! Yoooouuuu're out!

Hitch Trailblazer: What?! That's not in the rules!

Izzy Moonbow: Uh, yes, it is! Right here in the Forest Critter Field Day manual, page 403.

Sunny Starscout: What's Forest Critter Field Day?

Izzy Moonbow: [gasps] It's only the greatest ancient unicorn tradition there is! Every fourth purple moon, all the ponies in Bridlewood gather for a day of thrilling events and games! [mimicking echo] Games... Games... Games!

Zipp Storm: What game is this? "Bounce around"?

Izzy Moonbow: No, that's later! Hitch is training for the Bunny Hop Relay.

Hitch Trailblazer: You bunny hop through an obstacle course while balancing a crystal, then pass the crystal to your critter, who has to hop over hurdles to the finish line! I'm teaming up with Sparky!

Sparky Sparkeroni: [grunting]

Hitch Trailblazer: Sparky, catch!

Sparky Sparkeroni: [blows fire]

[poof!]

[splat]

Izzy Moonbow: Mm. That's a crystal droppage penalty! You're out! [blows whistle]

[theme song]

Izzy Moonbow: [blows whistle]

Hitch Trailblazer: Wait, who's out? Me or Sparky?

Izzy Moonbow: You're both out! You dropped your crystal, and Sparky isn't even a critter! He's a baby!

Sparky Sparkeroni: [gurgles]

Hitch Trailblazer: But, but...

Izzy Moonbow: Look! [reading] "Every pony contestant must compete with a critter. No baby dragons."

Hitch Trailblazer: There's no way it says that. Oh. Wow, it does say that. Well, now I need a new partner! What kind of critter should I compete with?

Sunny Starscout: Ooh! A-A dog!

Pipp Petals: I know, but why did she text a dog?

Zipp Storm: Hmm...

Hitch Trailblazer: Aha!

Cloudpuff: [barking]

Pipp Petals: Ohhhh.

Zipp Storm: Mom sent Cloudpuff? With a note? Mom, just learn how to text! Ugh!

Cloudpuff: [barking]

Pipp Petals: Cloudy, wait!

Hitch Trailblazer: Look at that dog go! He's so fast! [gasps] Which is perfect! [gasps, grunts]

[door opens]

Pipp Petals: [panting]

Zipp Storm: Cloudpuff?

Cloudpuff: [barking]

Pipp Petals: [grunts] Huh?

Hitch Trailblazer: [pants] Whew!

Cloudpuff: [barking]

Hitch Trailblazer: He says, [overdramatically] "Dearest princesses, I bring to you a message from your dear mother, her Royal Majesty, Queen Haven of Zephyr Heights—"

Pipp Petals: Get to it, Puff!

Cloudpuff: [barking]

Hitch Trailblazer: Cloudpuff says that, before he delivers his message, [overdramatically] he first requires a meal of the finest—!

Zipp Storm: Oh, for hoofness' sakes!

Cloudpuff: [panting, barking]

Zipp Storm: [reading] "My darlings, it is with deepest regret that I must postpone today's mother-daughter brunch."

Pipp Petals: Hmm?

Zipp Storm: "Some very important state business has come up and could not wait."

Pipp Petals: [gasps]

Zipp Storm: "Let's reschedule for another time that's more inconvenient for you both."

Izzy Moonbow: Hmmm. Huh.

Zipp Storm: "With love, Mother."

Sunny Starscout: Um, did she mean to say "more convenient"?

Pipp Petals and Zipp Storm: [sigh] No.

Pipp Petals: Mom takes royal meetings all the time, but our special brunch is special. And she loves brunch! [gasps] I think maybe she has been pony-napped!

Zipp Storm: Come on.

Pipp Petals: Look at the bottom! A cute little heart?! When has she ever drawn a cute little heart on a note before?!

Zipp Storm: Hmm. You know what? That is suspicious.

[camera clicks]

Zipp Storm: What do you make of all this, sheriff?

Hitch Trailblazer: Make of what?

Pipp Petals: What else?! Cryptic messages and cute little hearts! Something sinister is ahoof. Maybe... Mom's being held hostage somewhere, all alone... with no brunch to eat!

Zipp Storm: Okay, I think somepony's being overdramatic. But something is definitely up with her. Hmm... Could you help us figure it out?

Hitch Trailblazer: I will help you.

Cloudpuff: [panting]

Hitch Trailblazer: And I know just where we should look for her first.

[bright music]

[indistinct chatter]

Hitch Trailblazer: Aw, yeah!

Pipp Petals: Hitch! The Queen of Zephyr Heights is not being held captive at the Bridlewood Forest Critter Field Day!

Hitch Trailblazer: But you never know! It's as good a place to start our search as any. Come on, Puffy! Let's go register!

Jasper: Now, don't lose this.

Hitch Trailblazer: Yeah! Hey, uh... you haven't seen any Pegasus queens around here, have you? Hmm. Well, guess you two were right. She's not here. But I'm sure your mom is just fine. She's probably somewhere enjoying brunch right now.

Pipp Petals: [sighs] Without me? Ugh! She could never!

Hitch Trailblazer: But, hey, now that we're here, now you can cheer me and Cloudpuff on in the first event!

Pipp Petals: [growls]

Zipp Storm: Come on, Pipp, let's go watch some weird sports.

Pipp Petals: [whines]

Izzy Moonbow: Or you could help me give out the trophies!

Sunny Starscout: I'll help, Izzy! All these new unicorn traditions are so fascinating. I'd love to get an inside look.

Izzy Moonbow: Ooh! Wait until you ponies see it! The Field Day games are so [snooty accent] elegant! Beautiful! Majestic!

[boing!]

[dust blowing]

Pipp Petals: [coughing] "Majestic".

Misty: [sighing]

[door opens]

Misty: Hello? Is anypony home? Sunny? Izzy?

[television hums]

Skye Silver: Stay right where you are!

Misty: [gasps]

Skye Silver: You don't want to miss a minute of our Bridlewood Forest Critter Field Day coverage!

Misty: Oh! [groans] This sneaking around stuff is stressful. I wish there was another way for a pony to get a cutie mark. Guess they're not here, though.

Skye Silver: Next up, it's "Push-Over"!

Cloudpuff: [barks]

Sunny Starscout: So, the point of the game is you push somepony over?

Izzy Moonbow: Right! Or they push you over!

Hitch Trailblazer: You just push? Is there a starting bell? Or a score? Do we flip a bit to see who goes first? Or do I just...?

[thud]

Izzy Moonbow: Right! Winner!

Unicorn Stallion: [chuckles]

Hitch Trailblazer: Wait! Him?! That makes no sense!

[bunnycorn squeaks]

[thud]

Izzy Moonbow: Another winner!

Cloudpuff: [barking]

Hitch Trailblazer: Whaaaat?

Pipp Petals: It's hard to focus on these games when all I can think about is Mom.

Zipp Storm: I'm sure she's fine.

Pipp Petals: Yeah, but I'm not sure! You're a detective! Can't you start a real investigation or something? [whines]

Zipp Storm: [sighs]

[phone beeps]

Zipp Storm: New entry – the case of the missing mother.

Pipp Petals: [singing] Yeeeees! [gasps] We should question that grumpy old Alphabittle at the Tea Room. He knows all the Bridlewood gossip.

Queen Haven: [distant boisterous laugh]

Pipp Petals: [gasps] That laugh! That's Mom's laugh!

Zipp Storm: Uh, no, it's not. FlyPad, play Queen Haven laughing.

Queen Haven: [lilting laugh]

Zipp Storm: That's Mom's laugh.

Pipp Petals: No, that's the phony laugh she does in public.

Queen Haven: [distant boisterous laugh]

Pipp Petals: That's Mom's real laugh!

[door opens]

Pipp Petals: [panting] Aha!

Zipp Storm: Mom?!

Queen Haven: [gasps]

Zipp Storm: What are you doing here?

Queen Haven: Ummm...

Pipp Petals: [whispering] Blink twice if you're being held hostage!

Queen Haven: Uh, girls! Th-This is Alphabittle! And, uh, this is his Tea Room! Alphabittle, these are my daughters, the princesses Pipp and Zipp.

Zipp Storm: We know him! But why are you guys hanging out together?

Pipp Petals: And why didn't you show up for brunch?!

Alphabittle: If you two are hungry, we got a great brunch here. Right, Haven?

Queen Haven: Mm-hmm.

Pipp Petals: [deep gasp] Hitch was right! You brunched without us!

Queen Haven: Didn't you get my message? Didn't Cloudpuff look so sweet with his little scroll? Sure it was a little cryptic, but you girls do love decoding things.

Alphabittle: Would you two like some tea?

Zipp Storm: We're having a family discussion! Can you please give us a minute?!

Queen Haven: Girls! That was very rude!

Zipp Storm: Like bailing on a brunch date?

Queen Haven: [sighs] Darlings, I told you that something important came up.

Pipp Petals: This is important?!

Izzy Moonbow: [in recording] Winner!

Queen Haven: [scoffs] This Field Day is a special occasion for the unicorns, and now that the Pegasus and unicorns are... reuniting, well, it's... it's important that we have, um... ambassadors to... w-when they...

Pipp Petals: What are you saying?

Queen Haven: I am here in an official capacity! Now, if you don't mind, Alphie and I were discussing official... negotiations?

Pipp Petals: Uh...

Zipp Storm: Yeah... We're gonna... go outside now.

Pipp Petals: Hmph.

[door closes]

Pipp Petals: [groans, gags] Did she just call him "Alphie"?

Misty: So, the dragon's not here, and I still can't get up the elevator. There's got to be something I can take to her. I can't show up empty-hooved again or... Wait! [grunts, gasps] Bingo! If I can't bring Opaline their dragon, maybe I can bring her their memories. Maybe there's magic in them.

Dazzle Feather: Now, what event is this we're watching, Skye?

Skye Silver: Well, Dazzle, I'm glad you asked. This isn't an event at all.

Skye Silver: What the unicorns are doing here is called a "jinxie" dance. This is an interesting ritual that they sometimes perform to "unjinx" themselves if they're confronted with anything magical. They believe magic may bring them bad luck.

Dazzle Feather: Aren't unicorns themselves magical?

Skye Silver: Oh, yes, but as we know, they didn't have access to their unicorn magic for many thousands of moons.

Dazzle Feather: Fascinating, Skye. Truly superstitious.

Skye Silver: And stay tuned after the games tonight at eight. The ZBS true Zephyr story: the royal family. Check back in with our favorite high-flying sovereigns.

Misty: [groans]

[clattering]

Dazzle Feather: The young princesses may have flown the nest of the palace now, but royal bonds are keeping this family closer than ever!

Alphabittle: [chuckling]

Pipp Petals: This is even worse than I feared!

Alphabittle: [laughing, snorting] Aww. Look at that cute little face.

Pipp Petals: Now she's showing him embarrassing pictures of me as a filly!

Queen Haven: And here he is as a little pirate. Oh, and here he's a ballerina! Watch this! He eats his whole puppy cupcake in one bite!

Alphabittle: Now that's a hungry pup! [chuckling]

Queen Haven: [sighs] Thank hoofness I have Cloudy. With the girls away now, I feel so... alone sometimes.

Alphabittle: Hey. You're not alone.

Pipp Petals: Oh! Ugh!

Zipp Storm: [groaning]

Hitch Trailblazer: Hey! Can you two Sparky-sit for a sec? We've got to get across this balance beam before those birds drop stewed cabbage balls on us!

Sparky Sparkeroni: [giggling]

Hitch Trailblazer: Thanks! I think I've finally figured out the rules! Ha-ha! [grunts] Ow. Ow.

Izzy Moonbow: [blows whistle] Winner!

Sunny Starscout: Huh?

Hitch Trailblazer: [sighs] Spoke too soon.

Hitch Trailblazer: [grunting] Yeah!

Izzy Moonbow: [blows whistle] Winner!

[crowd cheering]

Hitch Trailblazer: Huh?

Hitch Trailblazer: [grunting]

Cloudpuff: [barking]

[squeak!]

[crowd gasping]

Hitch Trailblazer: [gasps]

Sunny Starscout: Uh, winner?

Izzy Moonbow: Mm-hmm!

Hitch Trailblazer: [sighs]

Hitch Trailblazer: [grunting]

Cloudpuff: [barking]

Izzy Moonbow: [blows whistle] WINNER!

[crowd cheering]

Hitch Trailblazer: [groans]

Zipp Storm: What in the hay is happening out there?

Pipp Petals: Ugh, I don't know. This is literally what every sport looks like to me.

[microphone feedback]

Onyx: This poem means a lot to me. It's called, "Visiting Dignitary Queen Haven of Zephyr Heights is About to Make Public Remarks on the Grand Marshal's Stage". [clears throat]

[bongo drums]

Onyx: Pain. Metamorphosis. Long division.

Jasper: All right. Sorry, everypony. Uh... Queen Haven on the Mane Stage, um... right now.

[fanfare]

[crowd cheering]

Pipp Petals: Um...

Zipp Storm: Huh?

Sparky Sparkeroni: [gurgling] Huh? Ah!

Queen Haven: Thank you! I'm very honored to be here on this very special day. Here we all are – unicorns, Earth ponies, and Pegasi – united and rebuilding the strong bond that once...

[microphone feedback]

Queen Haven: ...we didn't, uh... We didn't realize how much we needed each other. How wonderful it can be when we're... all together. Which is to say, I'm very excited to join in the judging of the day's final event, the Forest Critter Grand Prix!

[crowd cheering]

Sparky Sparkeroni: [gurgling]

[shimmering]

Sparky Sparkeroni: [grunting]

Dazzle Feather: Coming up next – the final event of the day, and this is a big one! The Forest Critter Grand Prix!

Misty: [sighs, mockingly] "Oh, we're so happy! We all have cutie marks and get to live with our best friends!" [gasps] Oh!

Skye Silver: But before we get to that, let's take one more look at Queen Haven's very moving Field Day remarks.

Queen Haven: We didn't realize how much we needed each other. How wonderful it can be when we're... all together.

[bongo drums]

Onyx: On your marks... Get set...

Hitch Trailblazer: [grunts]

[pop!]

[trumpet]

Skye Silver: And they're off!

Izzy Moonbow: Oooh! Wait until you see this one! You're not gonna believe how wild it is! The Grand Prix is the biggest event of the whole day! I'm so excited!

[crowd cheering]

Izzy Moonbow: Wait! Ugh! Stop the race! We can't see!

Zipp Storm: Hold your hooves, Iz. Pipp and I can fix this. Come on, sis. Okay! They're pulling a boulder up a hill with, like, some sort of giant rubber band?

Izzy Moonbow: Oh, oh! That's the rock trot! Who's in the lead?

Pipp Petals: Hitch is!

Izzy Moonbow: Yes!

Sparky Sparkeroni: [grunting]

Unicorn Stallion: Um... there's a baby up here.

Unicorn Mare: Is this... a part of the race?

Pipp Petals: Hmm. Huh? [groans]

Zipp Storm: Now he and Cloudpuff are... Are they on water skis? Yeah! It's water skis, and it looks like they're being pulled by a gaggle of geese...

Izzy Moonbow: Oh, oh! The water fowl slalom! The goose is loose! Did they jump through all six flaming hoops yet?! Pipp! Pipp! What's happening now?!

Pipp Petals: No! [gasps] He's feeding her cheeses! From a fancy platter!

Izzy Moonbow: Who, Hitch? Hmm. They aren't supposed to eat the cheese until the Gouda Relay.

Sunny Starscout: Uh... Huh?

Pipp Petals: [shuddering] It's just so gross!

Sparky Sparkeroni: [giggling]

Unicorn Stallion: Uh, what do we do?

Sparky Sparkeroni: [giggling, blows fire]

[poof!]

Unicorn Mare: This is bad luck! Terrible luck! I know how to solve this! Bing, bong! Bing, bong!

Unicorns: Bing, bong! Bing, bong! Bing, bong!

[dramatic music]

Hitch Trailblazer: [grunting] Come on, Cloudpuff! We've almost got this!

Sparky Sparkeroni: [giggling] Ooh!

Unicorns: [gasp]

Sparky Sparkeroni: [giggling]

Unicorn Stallion 1: Oh, my chamomile! [faints]

Unicorn Mare 1: Uhhh, what do we do?!

Unicorn Stallion 2: Somepony help! Hang in there, baby!

Queen Haven: Oh, no! Alphie, look!

Pipp Petals: What's she pointing at?

Pipp Petals and Zipp Storm: [gasp]

Pipp Petals: Sparky!

Zipp Storm: Hold on, Sparky!

Hitch Trailblazer: Huh?

Sparky Sparkeroni: [gurgles]

Hitch Trailblazer: [gasps] Cloudpuff, hurry!

Sparky Sparkeroni: Oh! [exclaims]

Pipp Petals: [gasps]

Zipp Storm: I've got you! Oh, no!

Pipp Petals: Ah!

Unicorn Mare 2: Somepony use your magic!

Hitch Trailblazer: [gasps, grunts] Sparky!

Pipp Petals and Zipp Storm: [sigh]

Hitch Trailblazer: Are you okay?

Sparky Sparkeroni: [giggles]

Hitch Trailblazer: [sighs]

Sparky Sparkeroni: [gurgles]

Hitch Trailblazer: [panting] Come on, we got this! Woo-hoo! Yeah!

[crowd cheering]

Unicorn: Awesome!

Sunny Starscout: Woo-hoo!

Hitch Trailblazer: Whoo! Aw, yeah! Woo-hoo!

Izzy Moonbow: Winner!

Hitch Trailblazer: Yes! Whaaaaaat?!

Elder Flower: Yay!

Hitch Trailblazer: Huh? Aah!

[thud]

Hitch Trailblazer: Ugh!

Sparky Sparkeroni: [giggling]

Elder Flower: Oh, happy day!

Hitch Trailblazer: But I... But we... We finished first!

Izzy Moonbow: And Elder Flower finished second last year, so we promised her that, no matter what, she could be the winner this year. It's right here in the rules. Page 372.

Hitch Trailblazer: This is ridiculous! Let me see that! [groans]

[thunk!]

[bunnycorn squeaks]

Alphabittle: Thank you all for—

Hitch Trailblazer: Hey, can we get an official Grand Marshal ruling on this?

Queen Haven and Alphabittle: [indistinct whispering]

Alphabittle: The queen and I have discussed it, and there has indeed been a grave oversight.

Hitch Trailblazer: [gasps]

Alphabittle: The Bridlewood Forest Critter Field Day Grand Marshal awards the team of Hitch and Cloudpuff...

Hitch Trailblazer: Uh-huh?

Alphabittle: ...the very prestigious "Cutest Puppy Award"! [laughs]

[crowd cheering]

Hitch Trailblazer: The what?! [stammers] That's not even a real category! He's the only puppy here!

Izzy Moonbow: Winner!

Cloudpuff: [barking]

Izzy Moonbow: It says right here, dude. Cutest puppy.

Hitch Trailblazer: [sighs]

Zipp Storm: We are so sorry we lost track of Sparky!

Pipp Petals: Seriously! We let our own stuff get in the way, and we feel so bad!

Hitch Trailblazer: It's not your fault. I'm the one who let his own stuff get in the way of things. Sparky's my responsibility. I just got so wrapped up with these games and trying to figure out the rules. But the rules made no sense! That... Did that make any sense?

Pipp Petals: So... you're not mad?

Hitch Trailblazer: Only at myself.

Izzy Moonbow: Come on, champ! All the winners have to go answer questions for the Bridlewood Pony Press Association!

Hitch Trailblazer: [yelps]

Queen Haven: That was very noble of you, girls. It's not always easy to apologize.

Zipp Storm: Yeah, well, Hitch is our friend, you know?

Queen Haven: I do know.

Pipp Petals: Oh, yuck! Hitch is our friend! We play board games with him! Not like... like whatever this thing is—!

Queen Haven: Pipp Petals! Zephyrina Storm! You will listen to me right now!

Zipp Storm: [gasps]

Pipp Petals: Uh-oh.

Queen Haven: Sorry. [clears throat] It's just that... you two are growing up. You've flown the nest and started living your lives. But I still have a life, too. I love your new friends, and I love the ponies you're all growing into. And I also love—

Pipp Petals: Okay, okay, we get it!

Zipp Storm: We're sorry, Mom. We do want you to be happy.

Pipp Petals: Yeah. You deserve to have brunch. Even when we're not there.

Queen Haven: Oh, thank hoofness for that. I love you, girls.

Pipp Petals and Zipp Storm: We love you, too.

Queen Haven: Then hug Mother! [sighs]

[bright music]

Misty: [snoring]

Skye Silver: For Dazzle and the rest of the team here at ZBS Sports, this is Skye Silver wishing you all a magical night from Bridlewood. Fly safe, everypony!

[tires screeching]

Misty: [gasps]

Pipp Petals: [laughing]

Zipp Storm: [laughing]

Misty: [gulps]

[door opens]

Mane 5: [laughing]

Sunny Starscout: Which one of us forgot to close the window?

Izzy Moonbow: [laughs] Wasn't me!

Sparky Sparkeroni: [grunts]

Misty: Oh. Thank you. I... I must've dropped—

Sparky Sparkeroni: [grunting, whining]

Opaline: [voiceover] Get! That! DRAGON!

Misty: [sighs]

Izzy Moonbow: Hoofness gracious, Sparky! How did you get outside? Hmm... Huh.

Opaline: MISTY!

Misty: [gasps]

Opaline: Get down here right this instant!

Misty: [sighs] Coming, Opaline...

[bright music]

[credits]